An angry chick Troll's pasta salad

This recipe came to us from a reader named Dawn McInnish. We're not sure how good the recipe is. But we're publishing it simply out of fear. She sounds pretty tough, and apparently she knows where we live.

 

It's a recipe for a pasta salad. Which sounds like a pussy kind of tailgate dish, doesn't not? Not so, says Dawn, who writes below: "Just eat it and don't whine. If you're watching your girlish figure, you shouldn't be eating pasta salad anyway."

 

Yes, ma'am!

 

Here is Dawn, in all her threatening glory.

 

***

 

This is a make-it-the-night-before recipe, so don't eat it as soon as you get done with it. It will be too sweet and you'll send me hate email and hurt my feelings and I'll have to drive to Boston, because it ain't nothin' for me to drive to Boston and beat a man's ass. 

 

Don't try me. I punch hard for a girl.

 

16 oz. package of bowtie pasta

2/3 cup mayonnaise

4 ounces dried sweetened cranberries

2/3 cup sliced almonds

1/4 cup sugar

3 Tablespoons apple cider vinegar

1 Tablespoon crushed red pepper flakes

Salt and freshly cracked pepper to taste

 

Cook, drain and cool the pasta. In a separate bowl, mix all other ingredients while the pasta is cooking and cooling. After pasta has cooled, stir in other ingredients and coat all pasta thoroughly.

 

Go ahead and taste it now. I told you it's too sweet, but you wouldn't listen. See? Now put a lid on it and refrigerate overnight. Before serving, stir thoroughly and taste to see if you might want a touch more red pepper, cracked pepper or salt.

 

Um, did you want fat and calorie and sodium information? Sorry. 

 

This is tailgate food. We don't calculate that stuff on tailgate food. Just eat it and don't whine. If you're watching your girlish figure, you shouldn't be eating pasta salad anyway.