"Speaking of San Diego, I loved this e-mail from Tommy in Worcester, Mass.: 'Just thought you'd be curious as to the Super Duper Triple Secret 15 Scripted Plays that Norv Turner kept locked in a hermetically sealed vault guarded by the Secret Service, as reported by Andrea Kramer, a script so secret that he'd only tell his players right before the game: Here are the 15 plays of sheer offensive genius:
1) Throw interception to Colvin left
2) Run Tomlinson off left tackle for 2 yards
3) Throw incomplete pass down the right side to Davis
4) Throw left to Gates short of the first down
5) Punt
6) Run Tomlinson off left guard for 2 yards
7) Run Tomlinson off left guard for 8 yards
8) Run Tomlinson off right guard for 2 yards
9) Run Tomlinson up the middle for 4 yards
10) Sweep Tomlinson right for minus-1 yards
11) Throw left to Jackson for 14 yards
12) Get sacked by Colvin, and fumble
13) Run Tomlinson off left guard for 3 yards
14) Throw right to Tomlinson for 6 yards
15) Run Tomlinson off left guard for 0 yards
Play 16 was a punt. Norv's offensive genius is just stunning, I'm amazed the Patriots survived that game."
Hilarious item from Bill Simmons' mailbag
