Bonzo the prognosticating primate

Cold, Hard Football Facts for Sep 09, 2005



We'd like to introduce you to our resident picks expert, Bonzo the Idiot Monkey, a banana-slinging, coconut-chucking, mindless primate. He's back from his seven-month hiatus in Fiji, ready to take on all who dare call themselves pro football prognosticators.
 
Bonzo has a rather unique strategy when it comes to picking NFL games. He flips a coin. If it's heads, he picks the home team. If it's tails, he picks the road team. Theoretically, our prognosticating primate has the same odds (50/50) against the spread as you, us or the "pundits." Of course, we're armed with data, spreadsheets and Cold, Hard Football Facts. Bonzo comes to the table with nothing but blind, random chance. We're going to track his picks throughout the season and see how he stacks up against certain "pundits."
 
Since Bonzo doesn't really know what the hell he's doing, he gets a little help from Bob Lalonde and Keith Sawin, two friends of the Cold, Hard Football Facts. These guys apparently have some spare time on their hands in between paper football games. They're flipping the coin for Bonzo and tracking the picks for your entertainment pleasure.
 
Anyone who heeds the advice of the "pundits" might want to think twice after seeing how Bonzo the Idiot Monkey performs.
 
The chart shows Bonzo's picks against those of CBS Sportsline "pundits" Pete Prisco, Clark Judge, Greg Bromberg and Michael Fabiano. (A previous version of this story included a chart showing Bonzo's picks against a series of experts from HBO. However, because of an editing error, we've had to remove those picks. The HBO picks were not made against the spread.)
 
Favorite   
Spread
Underdog
Bonzo
Prisco
Judge
Bromberg
Fabiano
Denver
-4.5
at Miami
Miami
Denver
Denver
Miami
Denver
Cincy
-3.5
at Cleve.
Cleve.
Cincy
Cincy
Cincy
Cincy
at Pitt.
-7
Tenn.
Tenn.
Tenn.
Pitt.
Tenn.
Pitt.
at Wash.
-6
Chicago
Chicago
Chicago
Chicago
Wash.
Chicago
at Carolina
-7
NO
NO
NO
Carolina
NO
Carolina
at Minn.
-6
Tampa
Minn.
Tampa
Minn.
Tampa
Minn.
at Jax
-3
Seattle
Jax
Jax
Jax
Jax
Seattle
at KC
-3
Jets
KC
KC
KC
KC
Jets
St.L
-5.5
San Fran
St.L
St.L    
St.L
St.L
St.L        
at Detroit
-3
GB
Detroit
GB
GB
GB
GB
at SD
-4.5
Dallas
SD
Dallas
Dallas
Dallas
Dallas
Indy
-3
at Balt.
Balt.
Indy
Balt.
Indy
Indy
Philly
-1.5
at Atlanta
Philly
Philly
Philly
Philly
Philly
at Buff.
-4.5
Houston
Buff.
Buff.
Buff.
Houston
Houston
at Giants
-2.5
Arizona
Arizona
Arizona
Arizona
Giants
Arizona
 

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