Cold, Hard Football Facts Archive: Pigskin Detention

Here in Pigskin Detention, we have compiled all of your favorite smackdowns of the most idiotic writers, broadcasters and opinions in sports today.

Relive the classic moments in Pigskin Detention history: from the first time we called out Pete Prisco, to the moment his lily liver ran yella with fear of the Cold, Hard Football Facts, to the habitual assault on journalistic ethics that passed for a Ron Borges's football column, to our broad-daylight mugging of Skip Bayless in "A slow, hanging curveball" – the most lopsided rout on record since USMC vs. Saddam Hussein and the single greatest gridiron exposé in history. More recently, we've hung Mel Kiper's "expertise" out to dry, like a dirty jizz rag after a long overdue spin through the hot cycle.

But there's much, much more to be found here in the dank, dirty cells of Pigskin Detention, where the thin shell of credibility is torn open in our torture chambers of truth, revealing only the hollow bodies of baseless opinions.

Pigskin Detention: A Reading From The Book Of Manning

Cold, Hard Football Facts for September 25, 2013

Peyton was born in New Orleans, Louisiana. Eli was also born in New Orleans, although not in a hospital. For Brother Eli was born in a bakery, surrounded by turnovers.



Pigskin Detention: Would You Invest in 50 Danny Woodhead's?

Cold, Hard Football Facts for September 18, 2013

CBS' Dan Dierdorf says Chargers head coach Mike McCoy probably wishes he could have "50 Danny Woodheads" on the team. To illustrate the absurdity of this notion, imagine you're Mike McCoy and you're staring at your locker room with 50 Danny Woodheads.



Michael Irvin, Ray Lewis and Chris Berman Enter Pigskin Detention

Cold, Hard Football Facts for September 11, 2013

Late last week, the one and only Michael Irvin made a bold proclamation when he said Dez Bryant will win the 2013 MVP.



Patriots and Jets prove Anything is Possible in Week 7

Cold, Hard Football Facts for October 22, 2012

Tom Brady and his New England teammates escaped Week 7 with an overtime victory over the Jets .. but that doesn't tell the whole story. Plus, Cam Newton is lame.



NY Daily News revises Week 1 Jets cover

Cold, Hard Football Facts for September 11, 2012

Gotta give the NY Daily News credit. Not too many news organizations display this sort of transparency.



Unreal Super Bowl Media Day Legends

Cold, Hard Football Facts for January 31, 2012

Super Bowl Media Day would be a lot better if these tales were true. Okay, so Chris Berman interviewing himself on Media Day is probably true, but other than that, the following stories are intended for entertainment purposes only.



Chris Berman + Kelly Clarkson = true love 4eva

Cold, Hard Football Facts for January 26, 2012

Kelly Clarkson and Chris Berman should go on a double date with James Lipton and Andrew Zimmern. We shall be forced to read between the lines and take a look at these photos. If a picture is worth a thousand words, this post is worth 7,000 words plus.



Pigskin Detention: Eli finally confirmed in church of elite

Cold, Hard Football Facts for January 16, 2012

Eli Manning has cemented his own preseason proclamation. In so doing, he backed up some of his pundit supporters. And does rapper Eminem believe in Miracles? YES!!!



Pigskin Detention: Mike Smith's Tecmo Falcons

Cold, Hard Football Facts for January 9, 2012

Also, Phil Simms doesn't listen to Phil Simms. Plus, the NFL is cracking down on James Harrison's below-the-belt tackling with a new fine system. And we unveil updated Wild Card Commodity Rankings. Got all that? Sweet.



Pigskin Detention Week 17: The Chain of Sources

Cold, Hard Football Facts for January 2, 2012

During the countdown to the firing of the St. Louis Rams regime, several different nameless, faceless sources outsourced information -- or maybe it was just one little resourceful little source. That's according to Pigskin Detention's source, otherwise known as reality.



 



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