We understand that not everyone chooses to wait until games are played to determine how good teams are, as we do.

 

Sure, NFL coaches and players are trained to do just that – perform on Sunday – but what do they know? What fun is actually letting the evidence unfold on the football field, when you can make wild suppositions that no one will remember tomorrow?

 

We've been looking around at the other Power Rankings out there, and frankly, we're a little confused. We can understand why most have elevated the Patriots to the No. 1 spot, as their offseason was notably better than that of San Diego and Indianapolis. We don't agree with offseason coronations, but we understand.

 

But some of these rankers just make no sense to us. 

 

Let's start with ESPN. They select their rankings by committee, which should keep ridiculous outcomes from happening ... yet, for some unknown reason, they have the Kansas City Chiefs ranked 26th. This down from a summer ranking of 20 ... guess they must know something we don't.

 

Never mind that the Chiefs went 9-7. Never mind that they went 9-7 in the rock-solid AFC. Never mind that they basically have the same team they did a year ago. Never mind that starter Damon Huard badly outplayed Trent Green last year. Never mind that they actually made the playoffs last year. Puzzling, especially when they're ranked behind teams like Washington, Buffalo, Arizona and Detroit, the last two of which might the worst organizations in all of sports. (An all-time favorite Cold, Hard Football Fact: the Cardinals, one of original NFL teams from 1920, have won just two – that's right, 2 – playoff games in their 87-year history).  

 

Switching gears to USA Today. Their rankings are pretty solid, although their little writeups are about as insightful as a second-grader after his bedtime. Our main beef: Cincinnati at No. 8, ahead of Seattle, Dallas and the Jets. The Bengals were quite average last year, with an 8-8 record and more yards allowed than they amassed, and they had a terrible offseason. They lose WR Chris Henry (9 TDs) for half the season, their No. 2 pick (RB Kenny Irons) is out for the year, LBs Odell Thurman (suspension) and David Pollack (injury) won't return, and both starting tackles are hurt.

 

So why the optimism? Oh, that's right, the Bengals are one of those teams with a couple highly-visible offensive talents. And, somehow, year after year, that equals plenty of pre-season hype.

 

Peter King and SI have yet to come out with their preseason rankings, but his entering training camp list was a doozy. It has to be read to be believed – and we like Peter King! 

 

Also not to be missed is King's list of the top 500 players in the league.

 

This is a bit of a ridiculous exercise, to say the least, but we did read it from start to finish - the goal of any internet fluff piece is to get bored fat men at the office to waste half a day gorging on said fluff.

 

We liked some of King's picks. 

 

He had Chargers LT Marcus McNeill in the top 50; we supported McNeill as offensive rookie of the year last year despite the thick field of impact players. Also, underrated New England DE Ty Warren came in at No. 37, ahead of the usual pass-rushing suspects like Leonard Little and Charles Grant.

Some, we didn't like.

He identified new Patriots receiver/returner Wes Welker as an "impact returner" and ranked him an incredibly high 126th. This would be great if it had any base in fact –Welker was certainly a durable returner in Miami, but in 357 career returns he had just one TD and only 10 returns of 40+ yards. As a punt returner, he's been particularly bad, leading the league in fair catches annually and averaging 9.2 and 9.1 yards a return in 2005 and 2006. Welker is almost 100 spots ahead of Bills CB Terrence McGee, who is a better CB than Welker is a WR and also the superior returner (27.1 on KRs over his career)

 

In the battle of 37-year-old QBs, Brett Favre somehow gets ranked 72 spots in front of Jeff Garcia despite all evidence to the contrary; unsigned rookie Jamarcus Russell is No. 228, which seems a bit high for a player not in the league.

 

Also, Donovan McNabb was King's No. 9 QB – did he forget that McNabb was putting up MVP numbers before going down to injury?

 

Also, King says that players receive status points based on the positions they play – so how do four safeties make it into the top 29? Last time we checked, safety was one of the least important positions on the field. Need evidence? Simply look at the money, or lack thereof, that teams dish out for safeties.

 

Anyway, it's an entertaining enough list ... even if you have to read it in Pigskin Detention. 

Subscribe to RSS	XML
R|Mail