It's an unspoken rule in college football that the No. 1 team in the rankings can't lose its spot unless it loses a game.
But the NFL ain't college. And so Chicago leapfrogged unbeaten Indy to earn the top spot in our Dominant Dozen with its 37-6 gangland slaughter of defending NFC champion Seattle Sunday.
The Colts, meanwhile, held on for a 31-28 win over the Jets.
Chicago's 4-0 start is impressive, but it's their +87 point differential that makes us stare in starry-eyed wonder. Four wins by an average of 21.7 points per game are rare in any stretch of an NFL season. To do it at the start of a season is a sign of something special, like
the glow of neon outside our beloved Nudie Bar.
Being the sun-starved,
neon-bathed shut-ins we are, we went back and looked at every team from the last 10 seasons to put Chicago's start in perspective.
There were 27 teams that started 4-0 from 1996-2005, at least one in every season.
Not a single one of them tanked to finish under .500, although Marty Schottenheimer's Chargers did finish 8-8 in 2002 after their hot start. But what else would you expect? It was Schotzy, after all,
the NFL's all-time king of the late-season collapse. Of the 27 4-0 teams, 21 made the playoffs. But it was the teams that truly dominated the first four games that had the most success. By a longshot.
Your top 10 hot starts of the past 10 years:
1. 1999 Rams (+95)
2. 1997 Patriots (+90)
3. 1997 Broncos (+79)
4. 2001 Rams (+74)
5. 2003 Colts (+73)
6. 2002 Raiders (+72)
7. 2003 Chiefs (+69)
8. 2003 Broncos (+69)
9. 2005 Bengals (+66)
10. 1998 Broncos (+65)
Of those 10 teams, all 10 made the playoffs, with an average record of 12-4 on the dot. Five of those teams made the Super Bowl. Three won it all (1997 Broncos, 1998 Broncos, 1999 Rams).
The other 17 4-0 teams had an average record of 11-5. The group included one Super Bowl winner (2004 Patriots) and six non-playoff teams.
So, while the Colts are off to a nice start and should make the playoffs, the Bears are likely to be something special. And that's worthy of a No. 1 spot, college protocol be damned. Remember, it's the college system that f's up the national title game every year, anyway. So we'll stick with our system.
1. CHICAGO (previous rank: 2)
Last week: Da Bears Da-stroyed Da Outmatched Sea Frauds, 37-6.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: Rex Grossman's four passing outputs of 262, 289, 278 and 232 yards would have ranked 1-2-3-4 on the Bears' single-game leaderboard last year.
Next: vs. Buffalo. Then the Cardinals, 49ers and Dolphins. Three games at home, with a bye in the middle. Get used to the No. 1 spot, boys.
2. INDIANAPOLIS (previous rank: 1)
Last week: Peyton Manning rallied the Colts to a 31-28 win at the Jets.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: Rookie Joseph Addai averages 4.5 yards a carry for Indy; Edgerrin James is at 3.1 out in the desert, where careers go to die.
Next: vs. Tennessee. The Volunteers might have a better shot than the Titans.
3. BALTIMORE (previous rank: 7)
Last week: The Ravens won their second straight nail-biter, this one over the Chargers.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: All hail McNair! He's a hero, but his 75.4 passer rating is in the dreaded Kyle Boller Zone (71.7 in 2005). Must be the 23 yards rushing on 10 carries.
Next week: at Denver (Monday night). Win and the Ravens are for real. But the loss of massive guard Edwin Mulitalo for the season won't help.
4. PHILADELPHIA (previous rank: 10)
Last week: The
Eagles beat up on Old Yeller and the Packers, 31-9.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: Philly is third in the NFL in total point differential (+13.5) and is averaging 29.25 points a game.
Next: vs. Dallas in "T.O. Bowl"; four of their next six are at home
5. DENVER (previous rank: 8)
Last week: Bye.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: RB Tatum Bell is quietly on pace for 1,573 yards and a 5.1-yard average. It's gotta be the altitude.
Next: vs. Baltimore (Monday night).
6. SAN DIEGO (previous rank: 5)
Last week: The Chargers lost to the Ravens despite outgaining them 284-206 and winning the turnover battle 3-1; ya gotta love Martyball.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: Kicker Nate Kaeding signed a six-year contract extension early in the week, then missed a 40-yard field goal in a three-point loss. But he's rich, bitch!
Next: vs. Pittsburgh.
7. NEW ENGLAND (previous rank: 11)
Last week: The Patriots beat Cincinnati, 38-13. The list of opponents that are convinced they're still the better team after losing to New England climbs to a record 63 since 2001.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: The Patriots have had three different leading receivers in four games; in 2005, they had a remarkable eight different leading receivers in 16 games (tops in the league). Somewhere, Sterling Sharpe is happy.
Next: vs. Miami.
8. ATLANTA (previous rank: 12)
Last week: Michael Vick had his seventh 100-yard rushing game in a 32-10 win over the Cardinals, extending his lead on No. 2 Billy Kilmer (three).
Cold, Hard Football Facts: The Falcons have three of the top 10 in the NFL in big running plays (10+ yards): Vick (1st with 16), Dunn (3rd with 11) and Norwood (8th with 8).
Next: Bye. But they still might run for 200 yards.
9. SEATTLE (previous rank: 3)
Last week: Alexander sits and the Seattle offense is humiliated in a 37-6 loss.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: In 2005, the Seahawks rushed for 2,457 yards and Matt Hasselbeck had a total of 33 negative pass plays. This year, they're on pace for 1,680 yards and a flabbergasting 80 negative pass plays.
Next: Bye. President of football operations Tim Ruskell plans to spend the week asking for a mulligan on the Nate Burleson-for-Steve Hutchinson deal.
10. CINCINNATI (previous rank: 4)
Last week: Actual quote from Carson Palmer following the 38-13 loss to New England: "I know this is a team that we should have beat." Remember that one if they meet in the postseason.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: Palmer has thrown 34 passes to Chad Johnson, the most successful of which has gone for 18 yards. He was fifth in the NFL last year with 12 catches of 25 yards or more.
Next: Bye. The Bengals have road trips remaining to Baltimore, New Orleans, Indianapolis and Denver.
11. NEW ORLEANS (previous rank: 9)
Last week: The surprising Saints had 407 yards against the Panthers but fell short, 21-18.
Cold, Hard Football Facts: Drew Brees has had a weekly passer rating of 90 or better three times in four games. The Saints only had three such games in all of 2005.
Next: vs. Tampa Bay. The Saints have three home games and a bye over the next month.
12. JACKSONVILLE (previous rank: 6)
Cold, Hard Football Facts: Jacksonville had not allowed 36 points since Week 2 of 2003 season (a 38-17 loss at home to Buffalo). However, the Redskins and Jags were 2-3 in the Hog Index, so the potential for points was there.
Next: vs. N.Y. Jets. These two teams met in Week 3 last year, with Jets QBs Chad Pennington and Jay Fiedler both suffering season-ending injuries. Jax added insult to injury with an OT win.
Best of the Rest:
13. ST. LOUIS (14) – K Jeff Wilkins on pace for NFL-record 200 points
14. DALLAS (17) – T.O. spent Monday night counting 25 million reasons to enjoy Eagles' demolition of Green Bay
15. WASHINGTON (20) – Clinton Portis leads RBs with 30.2 percent of his runs going for first downs
16. PITTSBURGH (15) – Roethlisberger spent bye week wistfully watching CHiPs reruns
17. CAROLINA (19) – vs. Cleveland at home this Sunday, then it gets serious: at BAL, at CIN
18. N.Y. JETS (16) – Jets' offense averaging 5.2 yards a crack, up from 4.4 in 2005; defense allowing 5.6, up from 4.7
19. N.Y. GIANTS (18) – Bye week came at good time for G-Men, who had plenty of time to work on Coughlin mutiny
20. MINNESOTA (13) – Best cure for two-game losing streak? Home game with Lions
21. BUFFALO (23) – Losman's career INT ratio of 1 per 34.4 passes better than Flutie (31.6), Kelly (27.3)
22. KANSAS CITY (25) – Larry Johnson has 46.8 percent of offensive touches, highest in NFL
23. ARIZONA (22) – Cardinals lead league in "defensive punting" at 38.9 avg. against; also lead league in Kurt Warners (1)
24. TAMPA BAY (27) – Bucs' next game against fellow bottom-feeder? Week 17 at Cleveland
25. MIAMI (21) – Culpepper: 21 times sacked, 20 total yards rushing
26. SAN FRANCISCO (24) – Four lost fumbles in four games for RB Gore
27. GREEN BAY (26) – Chalk up another one for the Trolls; Favre has three turnovers in MNF debacle hours after Chief Troll's appearance on Milwaukee sports radio
28. CLEVELAND (29) – Commissioner's office has ruled: win over Oakland counts in the standings
29. HOUSTON (31) – David Carr had only three 200-yard-plus passing games in 05; he's already got four in four games
30. DETROIT (28) – Lions are 2-12 over last 14; does ownership attend games?
31. TENNESSEE (30) – It's not a good sign if you have the top two tacklers in the league (LB Bulluck 41, S Hope 40)
32. OAKLAND (32) – Special teams are horrible, too (36.3 per kick return against, 32nd; 13.7 per punt return, 30th)
Last week: The Jaguars lost their second straight, 36-30, at Washington. It's been a fast fall from 
